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Thursday, January 12, 2012

Mass vs. Area

Today, the scale did not move for me. Still the same 224 lbs I was yesterday, which is better than I expected. Eating out last night, I was SO SURE I would gain a pound!

Lol! Isn't it funny how we do that to ourselves?? Worry about small things... But this is different. It's not like I COULDN'T control it. I could have chose to not have cheese or sour cream on the salad... I could have only eaten half. I could have eaten a HUGE plate of veggies before I even left home! I could have ate on my own at home, while everyone else went out. I could have made a better choice. Now, once the choice was made, what's done was done. There was no point in stressing about it... No point in beating myself up about it. Just a lesson learned. Chalk it up for next time.

Anyway, not to get off-topic, they say, "When the scale doesn't move, check your measurements".  So I did. The tape shows 1" lost in the bust, and 2" in the waist!! WOO HOO!! (^^) Personally, I prefer to lose inches. I could care less what I weigh, as long as my measurements are decent and clothes look nice.

Something else I've noticed that has changed in the past couple days, I have more CONFIDENCE. Ok, I'm a stay-at-home mom. The only place I go is the grocery store. I still love my sweats. I do not wear make-up very often. BUT, I walk around with my head a lot higher. Even at home! I stand up straighter, have my shoulders back, and more of a spring in my step. For the first time in a loooong time, I am TRULY confident!

On the subject of confidence, the fact that I am actually a very insecure person would surprise most people. I believe in a simple thing that I call "Fake it 'til you make it!".  It's taken me quite far in life, really. But once I'm home, and the "show is over", so-to-speak, I worry about how I came across to people, how I looked to people. Did I say/do the right things? What if they don't like me? What if I didn't make any friends? What if they were just being cordial? Do I look too fat in this? Will people look at me and just see my fatness? In recent social situations, I hide behind my son. I talk about him, I play with him, I position him in front of me so that he is seen first. When Scott isn't available, I talk to the other people about themselves. People like it when you take an interest in them. Does it work? I'm not quite sure. I do have friends though, so I must be doing something right!

Meeting with some of my old bible study friends this afternoon for lunch. Yep, eating out AGAIN! The advantage of this restaurant is they have a nice array of vegetarian dishes, the food is Mediterranean. Once again, worried about the salt, but I can't just be a recluse for the next 10 days either!