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Thursday, January 19, 2012

God.

I'm a Christian, with a Unitarian mindset. I truly believe that EVERYONE needs faith, and that you can't go at things "alone". Spiritually, we need to be on the same page as God.

Today, I started a Bible Study class that focuses on switching our cravings to the Lord. Anything that we do in excess isn't bad for us just physically, but it hinders our Spiritual growth and development as well. Something finally "clicked".

Like Pastor Todd said at our church a couple weeks ago, there are 2 ways to go about things:
We can go at it alone, and do it "our" way.
Or, we can do it God's way.

Being Christian, and knowing what I know, any time that you attempt things without God, you usually struggle and rarely succeed.

I want to lose weight. I want to keep it off. I need God. I need to include him in this process with me.

And I mean more than just saying my prayers at night.

Instead of eating ((or smoking)) out of stress, frustration, disappointment, anger, fear, sadness, I should be praying. I should be hitting the Bible. I need to turn to him, for he is the one that can really "fix" me and alleviate a negative situation.

It's not that I wouldn't be successful without this class, I would because I am determined. However, I've been struggling. I have a lot more emotional issues involved with food than I gave myself credit for. PINK touches on these a little bit, but just not the same way that I need it to. This Bible study will force me to look at myself a lot harder and grow beyond just losing weight.

For example, just last night I got scared. Scared of being thin.

I've never been thin before. I've always been kinda big. How would this change affect me as a person? How else would I be different? I mean, I like ME. I really do!

It seems like an irrational fear, however, if you are a larger person yourself, I think you can connect to that fear as well. I can't explain it. I know, it sounds stupid. But it really isn't. Maybe it's just the way I identify myself, as a big girl. But we can't identify or label ourselves ((or other people)) by weight. That's just ridiculous! I AM MORE than my pant size, or the number on the scale, or my measurements.

This is an area that needs "fixing".

My goal isn't so much to lose weight as it is to keep it off and be healthy.

I can't be healthy if I'm not complete physically, mentally, emotionally, and Spiritually.

For the first time since the scale said I was down 12 pounds, I have confidence and reassurance again! Everything will be ok! God has a plan, and God's plan is perfect! So, by including him in my "journey" that makes my journey perfect too! :)